Raceplay in the Age of Racism

Throughout my years of writing, I’ve covered just about every topic under the sun. The topics are delicate, spicy, erotic, and sometimes controversial. 

The topic of raceplay is no different. If you’ve never been opened up to the world of raceplay, in short, it’s a form of roleplay that focuses on the color or race of each person involved. Raceplay can vary from subtle racial slurs to intense slave play. Remember, controversial topic. 

The key to successful raceplay is to be sure that it’s consensual on both sides. It’s a strong possibility that your partner would be surprised if you started calling out racial slurs in the middle of sex. It’s something that you need to discuss before you start, and set clear boundaries on what you’re both comfortable with. 

RACISM AND RACEPLAY

The topic of raceplay is so controversial because it bases itself on racism and racial discrimination stereotypes. 

To be very clear, just because you’re into raceplay, does not mean that you have racist tendencies. 

I could easily compare this to rape play (a.k.a. consensual forced sex)- just because it gets me excited, it doesn’t mean that I want to be raped in reality. It’s very possible to keep your bedroom fantasies separate from your real life. It’s simply a kink. 

I’m a firm believer that what you do in the bedroom is no one’s business but your own, as long as it’s consensual. Nobody else is to say what sexual fantasies you should or shouldn’t play out. Many people intrigued by raceplay are afraid to speak out about it in fear of being judged or ridiculed, but raceplay can be perfected with mutual respect from both you and your partner. 

SEXUAL PREJUDICE DISCRIMINATION

I was first introduced to raceplay when I was dating a Black man. I had my first raceplay roleplay with him. To learn more about raceplay for this article, I took to the internet to explore the topic and create a guide on how to get started. The most effective research is firsthand experience, so the closest thing I found to that was a website called blackpayback.com. It’s an interracial porn site that focuses on only white women being used by Black men. 

If you’re still on the line of knowing if raceplay is for you, start with a few videos and see how you feel. Or visit reddit.com, or Fetlife.com.  and there raceplay groups. If it totally captivates you, you can have more security going into raceplay in real life. 

Most people have sexual fantasies and are too nervous to share them. Just do it! You could find that your partner is completely open and ready to try the same things you are. The more you dwell on the discussion, the more time you waste having sex that bores you. 

An easy opening to this sometimes difficult conversation is pulling up your favorite porn to watch with your partner. Engage in what you’re watching together and try something new. Dive into raceplay by using racial slurs and see where it takes you from there. 

Raceplay can be degrading or nurturing, but the core comes from using racial stereotypes to get you excited. One thing I’m passionate about in any type of sexual activity is the use of a safeword. This could make or break your experience with raceplay. 

SAFEWORDS

Safewords can be used during any kind of roleplay to sound the alarm that you’re uncomfortable without breaking up the action. If you’re being rough and like to scream, you can still do that without having your partner worrying if it’s real or part of the act. 

Here’s what I’ll leave you with- raceplay is not for everyone. Some people, especially people of color, might be downright offended that it even exists. But if it’s something that you think could add a little fun to your routine bedroom activities, start small, and try something new! 

By: Jill Hills, Sexpert